Until yesterday, I had never heard of "She Speaks." I have a list of blogs that I read on a daily basis, and yesterday, Linda at 2nd Cup of Coffee wrote about "She Speaks." After reading her post, I decided "She Speaks" was a Christian conference for women, and I thought no more about it other than a mild curiosity.

Today, Big Mama's post had a button linking to "She Speaks," so I checked it out just to satisfy my mild curiosity. Here is what I found.

Astonished, I realized that I know Lysa TerKeurst...well, maybe not know her, but I listen to her on the radio every day. She always has little tips for wives, moms, ladies about how to continue to walk closely with God. I love her little radio tips!

I read more about the conference and found out that they have a session for writers:

For Writers: You have had a passion for writing and have even had people
encourage you to write a book, but have never known how to get started on the
pathway to publication. You will have the chance to attend sessions taught by
some of the top Christian publishers and make appointments to pitch your book
proposal. Or maybe you are a blogger and just want to learn how to more
effectively connect with your readers and increase the impact of your blog. What
better way than to sit in sessions taught by three of the most widely read blog
authors: Boo Mama, Big Mama, and Rocks in My Dryer. Whatever the case may be,
after attending this conference you will:
>Discover your unique writing voice and the mechanics of effective writing
>Understand what publishers are looking for and how to write proposals that get their attention
>Better understand how to build your writing portfolio by getting published in magazines
>Know how to write a book that will impact your reader from start to finish

That gripped my heart, and I felt my lungs squeeze inward ever so slightly. I don't know why this is so hard for me to share, but I have been writing a book for years now, and I want it to be published. I know that God has called me to write. He has given me a burden to reach others through stories and a heart to minister through novels. In fact, I have ideas for a trilogy of books and many other stories in my head begging to be written.

There, I said it. I'm having a mild panic attack now.

Honestly, I don't know why letting others know about my dreams scares me silly, but it does. Maybe I am afraid of failure. Maybe my pride is afraid of public failure. Many people have encouraged my writing. In fact, many of my blog readers have commented that I should write a book. Every time I read those comments, I am encouraged and frightened, "Do they know? No, they can't possibly."

Well, Proverbs 31 ministries is hosting a contest giving away a free ticket to the conference, and in order to enter the contest, I need to post on my blog why I want to win. So here I am, posting on my blog. I want to win because I want to write freely, and I want to learn how to find a publisher or editor or someone to help me fulfill this calling.

So now it's out in the open. And maybe God just wanted me to be brave (read humble) enough to put it out in the open, whether I win the contest or not.