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I have a magically self-destructing house. Yes, I know there are little helpers named Liberty and Mercy who aid in the destruction, but there's more going on here than the usual messiness of a normal dwelling place.

For example: I did dishes just yesterday. Two dishwasher loads and one in-the-sink-by-hand load. Today? Magically, the sink and counter are over-flowing, and that's after the dishwasher load this morning.

The table? Yes, I vaccumed underneath it this morning after breakfast. I wiped it's surface down with a Clorox wipe. It sat beautifully waiting for the next meal to be served. And now? Now, spaghetti noodles litter the floor under and around it. Noodles that cannot simply be vaccumed away. Noodles that cling and require hands and knees on the floor and fingers to pry them loose from the carpet fibers they have been reuinited with after twenty years of laborious and determined searching.

My laundry hampers mock me. Overflowing with dirty clothes, even though I have washed and dried five loads in the past two days. It has to be magic, because I only wear one set of clothes each day. Jeremy only wears two sets of clothes each day. Mercy wears maybe three, and Liberty only twelve per day, so really, do the math. It's magic.

I'm ready to find a house that contains the opposite magic. One that resists stains even if your three-year-old purposely pours grape juice onto the beige carpeting. One that sanitizes dishes even as you are eating from them. One that washes, dries, irons and PUTS AWAY clothing immediately after the clothing is removed from a body.

Is that too much to ask? I don't think so.
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3 Responses
  1. Suanna Says:

    My thoughts exactly!!! The dishes (never ending), I do laundry every day, but no matter how many times I fold something it needs to be refolded (thanks to whoever decided Mommy hasn't worked hard enough). The floor, under our table is laminate and the kids take turns sweeping it once a day and it still doesn't get clean. Have you tried a vinyl table cloth under the girls chairs that you can take and shake out after a messy meal? I use flylady.net and still have these problems, though they have become manageable (except on a bad day). Oh, and the kids help fold the laundry and put it away too (its usually still wrinkled though).


  2. Anonymous Says:

    Wow! Let me know when you find that magical house that self-cleans. I want one too :)


  3. Unknown Says:

    When you find that house let me know. We will probably move into that neighborhood.


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